D&C 58:26-27

Ok, this is a follow up of my last post.

I only worked with Shawn for 2 days before he left on his mission (he's in Jamaica). So, after he left, obviously I was working, but Abe also came to work. (Ok his name isn't really abe, but I feel cool holding information from you). So me and Abe were left to do the same type of jobs Shawn had been doing. Now I'm sure most of you have met a one-upper, but you may not be familiar with the term. Allow me to familiarize you, a one-upper does not lose...EVER!!!...however, this basically relates to stories, meaning, if I tell a cool story, he has a cooler one, which probably (probably is an understatement) isn't true, but he presents it as true (wow that was a huge run-on sentence, oh well, it's my blog).

Abe, however, was not just a one-upper, he also didn't work.

At all.

Ask Grandfather and he will tell you of countless times of inviting Abe into his office and telling him that if he wasn't related, he would fire him, and begging him to start working harder. Now, Abe to me became comical, some of his stories are...hmm...how to put it...incredible...UNBELIEVABLE...amazing...RIDICULOUS...oh did I mention, NOT BELIEVABLE. So, I'm going tell you some of his stories and also some of the strange things that he would do at the shop.

At the shop we had one of those cool water dispensers, that has paper cups on the side, a big jug of water on top that you switch out, and it dispenses hot and cold water, you know what I'm talking about (I hope). One of the weird things that Abe would do was he would get the paper cups and cut the tops off, draw all over them with magic marker, and not clean up the mess. Paul (Who was basically our boss, he basically does the same jobs that we did, he doesn't rebuild the trannies.) anyway, Paul would often ask him first to pick up, and second why he cut the tops off. Abe said that he did that so that he could remember which cup was his; however, I know for a fact that he cut off the tops of several cups a day.

Then, at the end of the day, he would often get a cup of hot water from the dispenser, now this wasn't like lukewarm water, this was so hot that it melted the wax off of the sides of the cup and you could see it on top of the water!, AND HE WOULD DRINK IT!! I always asked him why and he said because it woke him up. AT THE END OF THE DAY! We've been moving big, heavy trannies in 90+ degree heat, all day long, and you're drinking scalding-hot water at the end of the day, to WAKE YOU UP?

Ok so now for some of the stories.

One time he was up in wyoming with some of his friends lighting fireworks for the 24th or something. They apparently had bought a complete firework store, because after they had lit fireworks to their hearts content, they still had a huge box of fireworks left. So they decided to light them all at the same time. But they weren't going to just light the box on fire, that just isn't enough fun, they cut a hole in the bottom of the box, made a gasoline fountain (???), lit the gasoline fountain (I swear this is exactly what he told me), and ran. He says that bottle rockets were flying past his ears, he is diving like he is in a James Bond movie barely dodging these fireworks that are shooting every which way. WOW!

One kid that went to his high school apparently found a way to make money grow on trees. He drives a dodge viper to school during the week, and his weekend car is a lamborghini murcielago. According to Abe, there are 3 Lamborghini Mucielago's in Utah and they own 2 of them. Ya, that right there is ridiculous, but it gets better.

So this kid that went to Abe's high school, he must be a really bad kid. So Abe told me that he got a ticket for going, BRACE YOURSELF, 145 mph in a BRACE YOURSELF, 25mph zone. He told this while, Abe, Nephi (one of the rebuilders) and I were eating lunch. I didn't even to try to stop myself from laughing. I just busted up and I told him that I had a really hard time believing that.

"I've seen the ticket!" he said.

I said, "I highly doubt that he would just get a ticket, I'm pretty sure he would get his license revoked and get arrested for reckless driving"

No response. "Besides," I said, "where is there a straight piece of road that is a 25 mph zone?"

"Oh, it's just over on the east side of sandy"

"Hmm..Wow...That's pretty crazy"

We went on talking for the rest of lunch, and as our lunch break ended I said, "We should probably get goin Abe" I let him go first and after we walked out I stuck my head back in the breakroom and said, "145 miles per hour-" "In a 25 mile per hour zone?" Nephi finished for me.

You'll probably hear a lot more stories about Abe in days to come.

A life lived in fear is half lived.
       - Anonymous

Have a great day!