Headline on this month's readers digest

On the front cover of this month's readers digest read the story headline "13 things identity thieves won't tell you."

First off, how many of you are in contact with your identity thief/thieves and how honest are they with you? Are they holding back their secrets? Is the relationship open and personal? Or secretive? What isn't he/she telling you?

Now, to further mock this stupidly chosen headline, I have come up with my own list of 13 things that I doubt that identity thieves will tell you.

13. His (for the sake of this list, we're assuming it's a dude) mother's maiden name.
12. The answer to his "secret question" to change his passwords.
11. His credit card number
10. His social security number
9. Bank account number
8. Pin number
7. Kids names and birthdays
6. Passwords
5. His name
4. His address
3. His phone number
2. Where he keeps his valuables

And number one on the list of things that Josh thinks that your identity thief won't tell you:

1. Uh...THE FACT THAT HE'S STOLEN YOUR IDENTITY.